Archive for February, 2010

#41: Guarding my heart…

Posted: February 25, 2010 in Uncategorized

So the past couple of weeks have been a true challenge because I have felt overwhelmed by a really depressive spirit… and I know I’m not depressed, but something kept weighing down my heart… I kept feeling like things were hopeless or that I was worthless or just weird heavy spiritual warfare… and it was consuming my thoughts, mind, and I couldn’t sleep…

The past few days though… I’ve felt this awakening and a very huge REALIZATION of how I need to guard my heart and be a lot more alert.  Sneakiness is the enemy’s forte and he’s a pro.

Some verses he put on my heart:
Proverbs 4:23
Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flow the springs of life

Ephesians 6:10-12
Finally, be strong in the Lord and in the strength of his might.  Put on the whole armor of God, that you may be able to stand against the schemes of the devil.  For we do not wrestle against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the cosmic power over this present darkness, against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly places.

I was also really encouraged when I read this, that I could have confidence because Jesus was interceding for me always:
Hebrews 7:25
Consequently, he is able to save to the uttermost those who draw near to God through him, since he always lives to make intercession for them.


It’s been rough… getting job offers in other states is flattering and cool, but getting none from Chicago and getting rejected from another in Chicago is incredibly frustrating.   I feel like the enemy uses it to manipulate my heart and mind to think I’m not supposed to be in Chicago.  It’s very strong… but deep inside, I know that God wants me to be in Chicago, at least immediately now… but I have to admit it’s a struggle.  Please pray for me.

Tutoring is going well though… I have a bunch of students and they are normally (hahaha) bright and make me laugh so that’s great.  Laughter is great for the soul for sure.  Other than that, nothing new… I have been working on new songs and tweaking old ones… as soon as Hawon is less busy and I can make time to get up to his awesome ghetto fabulous home recording studio, putting down some tracks is the goal.  Hooray!  Please pray for me about that too.

I loved how they recorded this, but I feel like a lot of people are doing it.  GREAT song though.  Love it!

The song is “Love Came Down” by Brian Johnson from Bethel Church in Redding, CA.

Been thinking I need a change.  used to change my hair color a lot. Remember this?!

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